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Failure is unimportant. It takes courage to make a fool of yourself.

Author: Charlie Chaplin
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Marrying an old bachelor is like buying second-hand furniture.

Author: H. Jackson Brown, Jr.
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May you live to be 100 and may the last voice you hear be mine.

Author: Frank Sinatra
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How can I believe in God when just last week I got my tongue caught in the roller of an electric typewriter?

Author: Woody Allen
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No self-respecting mother would run out of intimidations on the eve of a major holiday.

Author: Erma Bombeck
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Marriage is the alliance of two people, one of whom never remembers birthdays and the other never forgets them.

Author: Ogden Nash
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Santa Claus has the right idea: visit people once a year.

Author: Victor Borge
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Each place has its own advantages - heaven for the climate, and hell for the society.

Author: Mark Twain
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It’s not that I’m afraid to die. I just don’t want to be there when it happens.

Author: Woody Allen
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I don’t want to achieve immortality through my work… I want to achieve it through not dying.

Author: Woody Allen
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